I am a notoriously famous soft-rice man in the tycoon circle, living as a matrilocal husband in the Gu family for four years, doing no work, no socializing, only eating, sleeping, and playing video games. Mother-in-law says I waste water, electricity, and grain, and sister-in-law says my face is good. In my past life, I was a jewelry thief; in this life, I just want to idle my life away. Last week, a ruby customized by the Middle East royal family vanished into thin air inside the vault, leaving forty-eight hours of data logs and security experts with no results. My wife sat in the study smoking a cigarette, glanced at the blueprint, and said, "So simple, you can get in from right here."